How to get rid of charity workers

Today I've found the secret to fending off those overpaid charity workers who are there to haunt and destroy you in the street. Instead of telling them you're a poor student or whatever just tell em you already donate to their charity. This will secretly annoy them because they won't get commission, so be prepared for more questions:

1. How long have you donated?
- Play it safe and say two months in case the charity is new.

2. Have you received our tax declaration thingy form?
- Yes isn't that where you manage to get more money out of my donation? I did get it and I must look over it when I get the chance.

One major mistake I made one day when I was stopped by a child sponsorship person was to pretend I already sponsored a child. She was Slovak herself and was giving me a proper grilling about it, when she asked me what country did I sponsor a child in, I blurted Poland. The look of horror on her face when I said this as she explained to me that Poland isn't a third world country.
"It was when I started sponsoring" and I got the fuck outta there as quick as my trotters would take me.


Another option would be to wear a bell around your neck and carry a sign "Leper".

Little known facts about Donegal

Little known facts about Dear Old Donegal;
(especially aimed at the ignorants who think the following...)
My fellow Donegal gems,this especially for ye!!
1- Donegal is the most northernly county in Ireland true, but we ARE NOT part of Northern Ireland.

2- At school, we did Junior and Leaving Cert's...NOT 11 plus', GCSE or A-levels!

3- We DO NOT use sterling as our official currency.

4- Our car licence plates are likeeg: "06-DL-1234" and NOT "YIBA 7HA99"

5- Contrary to what some Dub's think, we DO get a clear 2fm signal.

6- We DO get TV3.

7- We sell and drink BULMERS, not MAGNERS!

8- Our nightclubs DO stay open past 1:30am unlike the north.

9- "Aye","wee","staysh","yon" are all perfectly good forms of the English language.

10- Yes, we did win the All-Ireland once (1992 was not the stone-age either)and been in 2 of the last 3 Ulster Finals!

11- There is nothing wrong in being from a county where accents vary dramatically from Ballyshannon to Letterkenny to Buncrana to Gweedore to Glenswilly.

12- Dunfanaghy is pronounced "Dun fan a hee", NOT "Dun fonn a gee!"13- Ardara is pronounced "Ard Ra" NOT "Are Dara!"

14- We dont' not shag sheep and ride our cousins.... bar Glenswilly.

15- So what if Newtoncunningham is all just one big inbred family.

16- MacCumhaill Park in Ballybofey is NOT named after Fionn MacCumhaill.

17- Rory Delap of Letterkenny and Gary Doherty of Carndonagh are not our favourite sons when it comes to what we gave to the Ireland soccer team.

18- Nor is Mickey Joe Harte of Lifford when it came to the Eurovision in 2003.

19- Yes we do have a townland in the north of the county called Muff and then Killybegs actually smells like one!

20- We gave the world Daniel O'Donnell, Packie Bonner, Enya, Shay Given and McDaid's Football Special drink....what has your county done!!!

Cuban Fridges

I've run out of inspiration for writing at the moment, so please amuse yourself with some images of Cuban fridges:

Farty Foods

I'm compiling a list of food which causes wind. This should serve as a fact sheet for anyone who's heading out and needs to... not fart. If you have any foods you'd like added, drop a comment. Here's my three so far

1. Undercooked Rabbit Burger:
As tried in Madrid. This stuff will crucify the poor person who tries it. In this case the burger was still scarlet red and pretty cold in the middle, but well cooked on the outside. About 3 hours of wind followed which felt like every hurricane that passed through Florida was emitting from my nether regions. Definitely one to be careful of.

2. Dried Apricots:
These little fellas not only cause wind, but create a difficult one to pass. Meaning CRAMPS! After having a feed of about half a box of these I was buckled over with horrendous cramps and ended up in Accident and Emergency of St. Vincent's Hospital. Granted I was there with my mate Alex who was sick, but I had the wind anyway.
- Not one to learn to quickly I had another feed of them a week later and found the same thing.

3. Beans:
The old reliable

Chai Ice-cream!

I was flicking through the internet and came across the Irish blogger awards. Turns out a lad in Kerry is nominated for his "Ice Cream Ireland" blog which gives recipes for sweet stuff and just has a little chat about his life and stuff.

The deadly thing is this lad has a recipe for Chai Ice Cream! I must try this one sometime... If it goes well with lattes I'm sure it'll go well with ice-cream too.

Chai ice-cream!